Comparative Marriage Definition: Marriage formally recognized union between

Comparative study of Pakistani and Chinese Marriage
customs

Marriage Definition: 
Marriage
formally recognized union between two people (Man and woman).

We Will Write a Custom Essay Specifically
For You For Only $13.90/page!


order now

Introduction: is very sensitive as a between man and
women for lifetime. It is a kind of that love bond and that loveable
relationship in which husband and wife spend every. They share their happiness
and love with each other. It’s not only the union of two peoples but also the
union of two perspective families. Sometimes marriage is arranged and sometimes
it depends on likeness by both partners. Every country has its own marriage
traditions and culture values, but one thing is same all over the globe that is ‘different but love is same. Here we
will discuss marriage customs and traditions of Pakistan and culture. Marriage
traditions of Pakistan and marriage culture.

Body: Pakistani marriage has many events given
below.

1.     
Before marriage

·        
Search
for proposal

·        
Proposal

·        
Engagement

2.     
Wedding

·        
Dholki
before few days of wedding

·        
Ubtan

·        
Rasme
heena

·        
Marriage
ceremony

·        
Nikkah

·        
Aarsi
Mushaf Dikhana

·        
Rukhsati

·        
Dinner

·        
Gifts

·        
Waleema

3.     
Honey moon

·        
Shab-e-
Zifaf

4.     
Regional
Variations

·        
Attan

·        
Baraat

·        
Bijjar

·        
Dastar
bandi

·        
Dholki

·        
Doodh
pilai

·        
Haldi

·        
Jol
bandi

·        
Maklava

·        
Mobaraki

·        
Paon
dhulai

·        
Saami

5.     
Religious Customs

·        
Haq
Mahr

6.     
Marriage songs

7.     
References

Search for proposal:

For wedding of boy
or girl is usually done by family this effort is done by any matrimonial sites
or relatives or third party member. But now-a-days this trend is losing
popularity. Boys and girls now-a-days select their partners by themselves and
go to court for marriage because they have their own mindset and both family
members are against of it. Some marriages are arranged by parents and both
partners understand each other and compromise with each other for themselves
and for their family. Some marriages are arranged and there is likeness from
both sides, both partners told to their parents and they send proposal to girls
home and they accept and marry both of them, it’s called semi.

Proposal:

send proposal
message to brides home. And grooms family pay potential visit to brides home,
and the first visit is purely for the parties to acquaint with one another and
for formal proposal. whether they like or dislike each other or not. If both of
them like each other than proposal message sent to brides home for her hand in
marriage, where elder members of groom’s family asked to bride’s family for
marriage proposal. After acceptance both families, grooms family give gifts to
bride and brides family offer sweets to grooms family to start a new
relationship not refreshments are served by bride’s family in happiness for new
life.

Engagement:

After few days or
months of accepting marriage proposal from both sides a ceremony is held by
both families to mark the engagement of couple and is called engagement or
mangni in Urdu language. It is a small family function in which just couple
families are involved and they exchange rings to each other. In traditional
values both couple don’t sit together, families elder members do this ceremony
and exchange rings between boy and girl. Then a prayer and blessings are
recited for the couple and the wedding date is decided.

Wedding:

Wedding are
arranged by family members of couple and it is different from each other
according to ethnic background and religion. However a typical wedding has
three major events Rasm-e-heena, nikkah and waleema.

Rasme-heena:

groom also wear
khussa as a cultural shoe. Bride also wear jewelry depend on ethnic background
and regional values.

In the start of
the function, hundred rupee note is set to the bride hand and then elder members
start the function and apply little mehndi on girls hand and then little piece
of sweet is fed to the bride and little amount of oil is applied to the girls
head. Then in similar function continues and in the end there is some musical playing
time. Same way of function is done by boy’s side. Family members sing
traditional songs and there is a competition of songs between both families and
function ends gradually.

Marriage ceremony:

This ceremony is
different according to different cultures. In Punjabi culture this function is
organized by bride’s family. But in baloch wedding this is settled by groom’s
family. Now-a day’s people don’t trouble themselves and organize function n
marriage halls and hotels.

Nikkah:

 Nikkah ceremony, a very holy ceremony is done
by Imam, mufti, sheikh or mullah. This is day when both bride and groom accept
each other as husband and wife in the presence of their family members and in
the presence of religious people to do it rightly. Firstly grooms Imam goes to
grooms side and said some religious words from “RELIGION HOLY BOOK CALLED AS QURAN-E-PAK”. Groom
follow and recite those lines and then give his signature on 4 papers with all
religion or family terms and conditions given by bride’s family. Then pray and
blessings are done by all guests for couple happy and prosperous life ahead.
Same procedure is followed by brides side, but bride didn’t explore her face in
front of unknown person until nikkah ceremony is done Then pray and blessings
is done by all guests for couple happy and prosperous life ahead.

Aarsi Mushaf Dikhana:

Arsi mushaf dikhai
commonly called as “Mun dikhai rasm” “Showing of the face of
bride and girl to each other”. Green
embroidered shawlis usually held over the couples head and mirror is given to
them so that they can see each other first time in the mirror. Then couple eat
a piece of fruit or sweet with each oDinner:

A dinner is served which is consisted of kebabs, naan,
shirmal.taftan falooda and kulfi etc. Various forms of meat like roasted
mutton, beef, chicken, pulao, biyani, chaanp and chargha served.

Gifts:

It is customary for a bride and groom to receive red
envelope of money and a lot of gifts from cousins from guests, friends and
family in reception. Then newly married couple received dinner or party
invitations from friends and family members to receive reception.

Honeymoon:

Walima and
Shab-i—Zifaf:

Waleema ceremony is usually held by groom’s family and
they invite bride’s family and their own relatives and neighbors. Then they eat
dinner together. Bride wears a heavy dress and gold jewelry from groom’s
family. When all guests left the house then bride is taken to the fully
decorated room by flowers by groom’s family members. Face of bride is covered
by her own dress shawl. When groom enter in the room, family allows them to
stay alone. Then groom come close to bride and put veil aside to reveal her
face as the first new thing at that night. Then husband give him a some gift
like ring or bracelet or necklace depends on choice.

Regional Variations:

Dholki:

Doodh pilai:

A ceremony in which cousins, friends or family friends
bring milk for bride and groom mixed with nuts etc. and they then present then
some kind of money.

Maklava:

As bride is entered in to new life and is sad she is
brought back to her parent house few days after after the wedding, so that they
spent some time with her family. Then she is again taken to her husband house.

Mahr:

Mahr is a mandatory payment, in the form of money or
possessions that will be paid by the groom to the bride. While the mahr is often money, it can also
be anything agreed upon by the bride such as jewelry, home goods, furniture, a
dwelling or some land. Mahr is typically specified in the marriage contract
signed during an Islamic marriage.

Songs:

Different marriage
songs were singing and played for enjoyment.

 

Traditional Chinese marriage customs

Traditional Chinese marriage is very
different from modern Chinese marriage trend. Wedding rituals and customs are
different regionally, because china has a long, rich and extensive history of
different cultures that have been subsumed into modern Chinese culture.

1.      Etymology

2.      Marriage in Confucian context

3.      Ancient chinese marriage

·        
Marriage
in early societies

·        
Mythological
origin

·        
Historic
marriage practices

·        
Maternal
marriage and monogamy

·        
Marriage
matters in Xinjiang

·        
Marriage
during the Han dynasty

4.      Traditional marriage rituals

·        
Six
etiquettes

5.      Modern practices

6.      Traditional divorce process

7.      Conclusion

Etymology:

In ancient writing
for the word ?? has (pinyin: h?n, literally means ” dusk, nightfall, twilight,
dark”) and the
radical ? (pinyin: n?, literally “a female”). It means
if marriage is done at night it will bring fortune for the couple going to be
married.

In Confucian though, marriage have grave significance of both
the families and to societies as well as being important of virtue. Its main
purpose that both families have got same surname and family line and paternal
clan. It is because of birth of boy over girl. During the Han Dynasty, the rulers of the powerful Xiongnu tribe demanded women from the imperial family.
Many periods of Chinese history were dominated by the families of the wife or mother
of the ruling emperor.

In maternal marriage cases husband lives
in wife’s home, and this trend causes the decline of matriarchy and growing
dominance of patriarchy in ancient china.

According to Islamic
tradition Muslims men or women should marry to Muslim person. But in XINJIANG a
Chinese man married to Muslim turkey women because she was poor. Otherwise she
will become a prostitution to live. In this way she got benefit of that she
does not have to veil even mullah forces her to do this, because chinese man
give her money for not only for her but also for her family members.

Chinese marriage system was
started between 42 and 221 BC. Instead of Chinese wide cultural system there
are three letters and six etiquettes. According to this tradition wife’s mother cannot go to her
daughter’s house for one year but daughter can go anytime to her mother’s home.

Six etiquettes:

Proposal:  An unmarried boy parents found a girl for
their son and just match each other family’s traditions. Mostly marriages were
based on reproduction and honor as well as the need of father and husband.

Birthdates: If
both parents are agreed then matchmaker match both partners birthdates  (Chinese: ????; pinyin: niáng?ng b?zì;
literally: “the 8 cyclic characters for year, month, day and hour of birth
of a man, which determine his fate”) in which suan ming (Chinese fortune telling) is
used to predict the future of that couple-to-be.

Bridewealth: Matchmaker
arranges a price of bride including a betrothal letter to the girl’s family.

Wedding gifts:  After
setting the price of bride grooms family send some sweets, cakes and other
religious foods to the bride’s house.

Arranging the wedding: Then
both family members arrange a date for wedding according to TUN SHING.

Modern practices:
In modern practice newlywed couple goes for photography in different outfits
and in different places belonging to their culture. But in mandarin Chinese
there are no first days of spring, like in 2010.They believe that in 2010 it
was a year of tiger and they believe 
that this year is very luck and ominous to stat any business or wedding.

Before bride and groom enter into nuptial chambers, they have
to do ceremonial bows as follows;

1.     
First bow is for heavens and earth

2.     
Second bow is for ancestors

3.     
Third bow is for parents

4.     
Fourth bow is for spouse.

Traditional divorce process

There
are three ways of divorce.

·        
First way is “no fault divorce”. According to Tang Dynasty
(618-907) a marriage can be dissolved due to persona issues.

·        
Second way is to mandate annulment marriage. It occurs when
any spouse do a serious crime.

·        
It is due to unilaterally declare a divorce by seven ways, if
girl do this,

1.     
Fails to bears a son

2.     
Jealousy

3.     
Serious or chronic disease

4.     
Gossipy

5.     
Commits theft

6.     
Filial piety

7.     
Vulgar or lewd

Conclusion: Marriage
customs and traditions globally are different and it is all due to their
ancestor’s culture. Every country has different and wide rich culture, which
explore their religious and cultural values. Despite of having different
cultures some cultural points relevant with each other, but their performing
way is different. It’s not only the sexual attachment with each other but also
the combination of both families so that they can share their happiness and
sorrows with each other.